How to Communicate For Results, Not Just to Be Understood

Sometimes it is difficult to know what we want to say or how to say it. There is another approach. Ask yourself "What I am I trying to accomplish?" If for example you are trying to discuss a financial matter rather trying to figure out what to tell them figure out what you want to accomplish with the situation. If you have loaned someone money and want to see if they have forgotten your approach would be different than if you goal is to get the money that is owed you. If for example I were trying to get money from someone that I had loaned money to and I thought maybe they didn't have it yet I needed it I wouldn't do me any good to talk around the subject in fact it could make the situation worse. However, if I make a comment like "I was totally stressed over the rent, then I remembered you are giving me money and that means I am all set." I didn't rely on someone else to provide the outcome I was looking for I controlled that.

Recently we had an opportunity that from anyone's viewpoint looked like a no brainer. However, upon further examination realized it would be a financial loss to our company at this time. Realizing the value of the opportunity from a market and brand awareness point only we didn't want to burn any bridges and prohibit future opportunities. Our approach was quite simple we need to walk away in a manner that implies this might work at another time. While we were focused on what we wanted to say we were having difficulty finding the right words. The moment we shifted to what we are trying to accomplish we found the situation much easier to deal with.

Regardless of the situation, work, home, family ask what am I trying to accomplish from this conversation and know the answer. If you aren't sure what you want to achieve especially if it is a difficult one then maybe you should wait until you are. Our words have power and we may not be able to choose how people react, however we are responsible for the words we put out there. Always speak honestly and from your heart, never from anger or betrayal. In any situation you need to know what you are trying to accomplish.

Cheryl Nordyke writes on a variety of topics about family, work and relationships. She is the co-owner of Waves of Gratitude an inspirational jewelry website and community. Visit http://www.wavesofgratitude.com or email her at wogjewelry@comcast.net

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